At we hit the quarter mark of the 40 Days of Dating Your Passion Project, I thought it would be cool to write a love letter to whatever it is you’re working on. It’s based on Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh’s concept of writing a love letter to a person, or maybe to something that’s been conflicting you for quite some time. Here’s a quote from the Zen master himself on writing a love letter:
“A real love letter is made of insight, understanding, and compassion. Otherwise it’s not a love letter. A true love letter can produce transformation in the other person, and therefore in the world. But before it produces a transformation in the other person, it has to produce a transformation within us. Some letters may take the whole of our lifetime to write.”
–Thich Nhat Hanh
So here’s a love letter I wrote to my fiction writing, which turned into a letter of apology of sorts, and makes me sound sort of like a dude:
Hey. It’s me, Jackie. I know we started this thing way back in—what was it—2006? and I know I haven’t treated you that great. We had this on and off thing, and I’ve let other things in the way. And I just wanted to let you know that it was totally all me. Here’s why:
Other things caught my eye. Blame it on society, or my parents, or the paralyzing multitude of options that are made available to us on a daily basis, or on whatever. I’ve got an awful case of The Wandering Eye. I’ll find something else that interests me and I let it consume me entirely. Some of them were silly flings, and didn’t end up meaning that much to me, like the time I wanted to be a professional hand model, or when I wanted to come up with a special spice mix for leftovers. At the time they seemed worthy of my time, but I was young, foolish, and unfocused.
I didn’t think I was good enough. I didn’t think my writing was very good, or had much value. I second-guessed myself, and what we had. So I ran away. I didn’t think I was good enough to have you in my life. I just wasn’t ready.
I gave my time to other projects and people. When other priorities are clamoring for your attention (sort of), acting like starving babies who need to be constantly fed, it’s hard to give the time you deserve. Okay, maybe I’m exaggerating a little bit. But still, it’s hard when other things seem more urgent or important.
You are not an easy thing to date. I know I said earlier that it was all about me, but let’s be honest. You require a buttload of attention, and focus, and discipline, and creative energy. Although I come off as a slacker in many areas of my life, I held high standards for what I wanted between us.
I’m ready for you now. And I’m gonna do everything I can to make it work out between us.
Endearingly Yours,
Jackie
What other kinds of love letters can you write? How does it make you feel? What do you learn about yourself from the process?
Hi, I am the owner and a teacher of a small community based school in Phuket, Thailand. On 2nd March we are having an open learning week as we want to know what our kid’s true passions are. There are no restrictions on the week. No direct teaching will take place and we will not lead the children in anyway. We will only offer them advice/assistance if they ask for it. There are no break times or lunch times set and work/projects do not have to be put away. I just came across your 40 days of Passion – great idea! if you have any suggestions for us for our week please let me know. We welcome all ideas and feedback! The kids are aged between 3- 11 years.
Hi Celi,
What a wonderful idea! I absolutely love it; wish that was something we did when I was back in school. As for suggestions, I would offer some sort of structured exploration for those kids who thrive more on structure? I would definitely not make it too goal-oriented, but process-oriented. Feel free to email me: jackie[at]cheapsters[dot]org. I will also shoot you an email.